Chris Writes A Fanfic Part 2

one day our hero chris was leaving flowers for his bestest and one true friend kendyl. then jack came out of nowhere and they fought and jack turned into a hulk. dahlia was cheering madly for chris because he was the hero and she didn't like jack because his hate was gay. chris's friend julian the zombie was there, except he had lady gaga with him and lady gaga was also cheering chris on. everyone in the world was cheering him on except wesker and lisa because they sucked. then chris's other friend shien came and was like CHRIS CAN I HAVE YOUR CHILDREN PLZ and chris was like no goddamn it, i'm not going to fuck you. then jack got angry because he's a doosh bag and found jill and thought  I'M GOING TO TAKE CHRIS'S ONE TRUE LOVE AWAY FROM HIM.

Jack gripped Jill's hips wetly, pulling her close  and looking into her ocular orbs. She looked at him back, smiling feverently, and pulling away. She took his hands and gently lead him to her room. She was wearing her sexy battle suit, and Jack was very horny for her. So puts his mayo in her sandwich and eats it. Jill says, "oh Jack, I love you come into my cave" and jack says yes, and then suddenly jill is having twins and is 18 months pregnant.

while jack is making babies with jill, liesel the most awesom communist you could ever know and the only ok communist comes by chris and dahlia and goes HI CHRIS YOU ARE PRETTY COOL LETS HAVE  SEX AND GET DRUNK AND DO FUN SHIT TOGETHER AND MAKE EVERYONE  VERY JELLY OF US. so chris says yes okay and they go to make everyone jealous.

so dahlai gets jelly and eats a sandwich. A JILL SANDIWICH. then kyoko comes and they start wrestling in  the mud, naked and chris is like OH YEAH BITCHES MAKE LOVE so they do and chris is like AH FUKKEN LEZ.

then suddenly wesker gets very haerd rage and begins to plot chrises altimate demise. he plans to have hundreds of sharks to rape chris while he sleeps. the plan fails miserably because wesker is pathetic, and lisa ends up hating him forever. then irving comes and starts to stick his mayo in wesker's hole and plow him. wesker goes OH YES BBBY I LOVE YOU and wesker is exposed as a gay.

Jack was tired of giving jill babbys so he left her and decided to go kick some ass. so he goes wandering around the globe until he sees alfred, who is pretending to be alexia and is making out with sexcella. jack beats them up and the sexcella tries to sleep with jack. jack says OKAY but when he sees her blue waffle he flies out of there with his super sayin powers.

he sees alan as he is flying because alan is a lovely and awesome fish and is flying because he is so cool. so jack says alan how i ber cool like you and alan laughs and says chris is much cooler so jack punches alan. alan goes flying and now everyone hates jack because he hit an innocent fish. then cliar  comes and says lolololololololol chris is the worst brother ever because he won't take em no where and then chris goes LETS GO TO RUSSIA she cries because she made plans which are soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important that she can't even spend time wigth her brother that saved her from dying. oh yah that's a real good sister thats why she is a butch lesbain

then lady gaga goes GAGA OOH LALA WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE and chris and lady gaga make out but then jak gets jelosu again so they fight while lady gaga is sad. so julian comes and kicks everyones ass because they're being silly and lady gaga is his mama monster.

then manuela comes floating in and she explodes and everyone turns back to normal except jill has like 13 babies and dahlai gets made and kicks her. then they fight and sheva and josh come with ancient voodoo majik and sacrifice the babbys.

THE END.